Do you feel more cultured now? See, who said this site had no point? Fools!!! Go to the Main Page!! |
Yes, here it is, Lunaretine's fan poetry Hall of Shame--er, I mean, Hall of Masterpieces! I will be accepting all types of poetry, whether it be a senseless parody or a turn for the dramatic. Poetry based on any video game is welcome. Size really doesn't matter, but please try not to make it only like three lines long. Profanity flies here, so you may use it. Just don't make the entire thing an ode to four letter words, okay? If you'd like to submit your work, please send it to me, and I will review and post it. |
Fan Poetry Section |
Now it's time to really rot your brain at the... |
Link says, "Write good poetry about us! You can write a lament for poor Kamek over there, who's obsessed with a dead chick!" |
Kamek yells, "Yes, send in some poetry, all you wannabe Shakespeares! You can write a sonnet on how Link can't get laid!" |
Yuna, who moves back and forth between the gallery and poetry sections, shouts, "Now boys, stop fighting! How about someone writes a poem about me, and how my love interest Tidus looks awfully a lot like Meg Ryan!!" |
Yes, here it is, Lunaretine's fan poetry Hall of Shame--er, I mean, Hall of Masterpieces! I will be accepting all types of poetry, whether it be a senseless parody or a turn for the dramatic. Poetry based on any video game is welcome. Size really doesn't matter, but please try not to make it only like three lines long. Profanity flies here, so you may use it. Just don't make the entire thing an ode to four letter words, okay? If you'd like to submit your work, please send it to me, and I will review and post it. |
Zelda, I Have Much Love For You! ~An attempt at recited poetry by the Hero of Time (that's me, Link!) Written by: Rinoafreak Princess, your eyes are so blue Like the sky, uh, they are very blue Your hair is blonde, and mine is too So that must mean I'm meant for you! I've traveled many lonely miles To save your ass from Ganon's wiles And your kitty, Miss Snuffles Umm, what else rhymes, maybe "puddles"? You're pretty as a pretty flower That's why I stare at you for hours! I like when you hold me on Epona Uuuuh. And the sound you make when drinking cream soda? But I digress, my fair, fair maiden! 'Tis with one truth, my heart is laden! The thing I want to say to you, Is Zelda, I have much love for you! |
Do you feel more cultured now? See, who said this site had no point? Fools!!! Go to the Main Page!! |
An Ode to Link By: Andcarkawen, The Fanged Angel Link shot that Ganon, With a big rubber band, Ganon's not manly, That pig he is bland. Link shot him with pleasure, Link shot him with pride, It's quite hard to miss him, He's 40ft wide. Link went to the funeral, He went to the grave, Bea Arthur threw flowers, Link threw a grenade. Link looked in the coffin, Ganon wasn't quite dead, Link took a bazooka, And blew off Pig's head! |
That Don't Impress Me Much: Sephiroth Style By: Andcarkawen, The Fanged Angel I've met a few guys who think they're pretty smart But you've got being right down to an art You think you're a genius you drive me up the wall You're a regular original know-it-all Ohh-ohh-ohh You think you're special Ohh-ohh-ohh You think you're something else Okay, so you're in SOLDIER. That don't impress me much. So you've got the brains but have you got the touch? Now don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright. But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night. That don't impress me much. I never knew a guy who carried a mirror in his pocket or a comb up sleeve- just in case And all that extra hold gel in you're hair oughta lock it in case -heaven forbid- it should fall out of place Ohh-ohh-ohh You think you're special Ohh-ohh-ohh You think you're something else Okay, so you're Sephiroth. That don't impress me much. So you've got the looks but have you got the touch? Now don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright. But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night. That don't impress me much. Yeah... You're one of those guys who likes to shine a tank You make me put on a mask before you let me see I can't believe you kiss her head at night Now come on Sephy tell me, You must be joking- right? Ohh-ohh-ohh You think you're special Ohh-ohh-ohh You think you're something else Okay, so your mother is an alien space freak. That don't impress me much. So you're kinda cool but have you got the touch? Now don't get me wrong yeah I think you're alright. But that won't keep me warm in the long, cold, lonely night. That don't impress me much. So what? Do you think you're Rufus or something? Rufus walks in and Shania Twain links arms with him. As they walk off romantically, Sephiroth Supernovas Shania Twain, leaving Rufus alone, and with soiled underpants. |
Sephiroth, who isn't too impressed either. Nothing wrong with being a momma's boy. |
Inventions with power of destruction Allow me to give credit to anxiety, To succumb this scientist And this brain's powerful deductions Random thoughts in my head, Voices in my brain; Those are my demons driving me insane. My very own hell, Of countless defeats, Of countless doubts out of hidden deceits. As I run out of time, locked in this place. Failure after failure, It explodes in my face, mocking me and my brain Sometimes a screw, sometimes a circuit Sometime it feels like, it always goes wrong, And sometimes I wonder, if it's me alone. Wasting my life, Over incomplete equations and wasting my brain, in the jaws of depression. I pay for my mistakes, Under sorrow and pain Under the false illusion that I wont fail again |
Collision Course By: Iggy Koopa, A.K.A. Vilmary |
Iggy felt the rumble on his hands, as he tried hopelessly to drive. He felt the horrible truth sink-in, and swiftly made a dive. Realization crawling in his skin, his Doomship is coming down and below it he sees the ground. He feels it happening and emergency exits don't count. He knows he is going to die, as he turns on every switch in options. He desperately pleads his attacker, for his young life, trying to course back to the sky. But it's too late, all is gone except fate. He sees his Doomship blast to pieces and the GAME OVER sign flip. All this is against his brother, playing electronic Doomship. |
Ludwig in saner times |
Iggy, whose driver's license just got revoked |
Up In My Head: In Ludwig's Words By: Ludwig von Koopa, A.K.A. Vilmary |
Cowardly Display of Apology By: Kamek Tirro, A.K.A. Vilmary Behind my mask, forgiveness I asked Cowardly display of apology I miss you Please forgive me I tried to hide the truth Simply watching you leave me I don't mind Your hate For my faith In this life Is my mate But you left You don't breathe Should have been my wife But no, no more sighs of life Behind my mask, forgiveness I ask Cowardly display of apology Your kid Like a light Left behind Shining bright I don't mid Your hate For my faith In this life Is my mate Like an angel He smiles my way Your departure The price he has to pay Behind my mask, forgiveness I ask Cowardly display of apology I hid away Out of jealousy Hid for a while Then found my way I don't mind Your hate For my faith In this life Is my mate I wonder why I couldn't see My way is with you Holding to me Behind my mask, forgiveness I ask Cowardly display of apology And even if I tried to justify, I wouldn't make A righteous analogy |
A poem that really touched my black heart, written in the words of Kamek. If you don't know who he is referring to, read my Diary Entries of Kamek Tirro and find out! A little shameless self-promotion never hurt anyone... |
The Pounding By: Roy Koopa, A.K.A. Vilmary All hope is turned to despair So much more than he can bear But I didn't notice he wasn't lying, As he whimpered; "Roy I'm really dying" I didn't think of the injuries I didn't care for his pain Enjoying his suffering He tries to make me go... in vain Suddenly I can hear him cry no more Realizing what I have done I call for help as I try to move him Realizing that he could be gone Biting my lips I shake him Sobbing in fear I call his name "Lemmy and Ludwig will kill me bro... Iggy please wake up it was just a game" |
The Circus By: Lemmy Koopa, A.K.A. Vilmary All I wanted to do was hit the stage ride on a ball and tame animals in a cage I wanted to fly in the great trapeze riding my ball with infinite ease I wanted to show I could ride my ball while juggling knives and never fall Beyond the laws of physics and mathematical equations was my ball riding grace and my prefect synchronization But fate one day made fun of me my father found out and said it was not meant to be Now I know with a broken heart that in a circus I won't play my part Now I will never ride the great trapeze Riding my ball with infinite ease Now no one will know I can ride my ball while juggling knives and never fall But of my moves I am still the master I can be two feet from the floor without causing disaster |
The Legend of Zelda By: Vilmary We admire Link, working cute Scottish habits, he's funny remarks, while being devoured by rabbits Yet that's not the tale, I've come to explain, I'll tell of a bitch, bought simple and plain Her royal name is Zelda, and she's no more than a whore, a mindless air head, and a bimbo even more She wants to shag Link, for no apparent reason, and her PMSing worsens every season Her cruelty to animals, surpasses expectations. yet her cruelty to Link, is worse in consideration. Link thinks her hotness, makes up for his pain. Mr. Lefty is not thinking, on her famous lack of brains There is something my friends, and I can agree; a dangerous beast such as Zelda, should be left to roam free. |
Original crime By: Iggy Koopa, A.K.A. Vilmary You follow a script, To be cool; To be a TV star. I might suggest You get a life; It's not too late for you to start. There is a price For a crime Called originality It's justified to Humiliate the ones With authenticity I hope my life Will not be thrown Onto a garbage can I see another Die around me being A superhero fan I'd like to be myself Authentically original Not somebody else Is it a crime? Too much to ask To wait from freedom bells? You think it's cool To laugh at me To point and mock But you look lame It's not even sane Can't you see that you fuck? |
Knowledge of the Omnipresent By: Larry "Cheatsy" Koopa A.K.A. Vilmary (Alludes to The Diary Entries of Kamek Tirro) Here is some knowledge about me There is no secret I can't see Eavesdropping doors for evidence There's no conspiracy I can't sense If there's a purpose I will find it If there is gossip I know that I will be there first To be aware is an addiction For truth no one can quench my thirst My siblings know that when around me There is no privacy to keep I am aware that I'm the slickest one Of all the residents of Bowser's Keep No need to tell me any secrets Of scandals I already know No need to show me anything Trust me I've already been shown I know that Kamek slept with "someone" Of that dad wasn't aware I know why Morton is still 'single' I know everything from everywhere Check if I am not around If you say something consequential It is always a good 'sport' To hunt something confidential. |
